Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said: Wit and Wisdom from America's Finest
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
The official tie-in book to the wildly popular Facebook page, featuring brand-new crazy, off-the-wall, outrageously funny, and downright "awesome" pearls of wisdom from real-life drill sergeants and instructors from all branches of the military.
Sweat dries. Blood clots. Bones heal. Suck it up, buttercup.
After his deployment in Afghanistan, Dan Caddy began swapping great drill sergeant stories by e-mail with other combat veterans-an exchange with friends that would grow into the dedicated Facebook page, "Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said." But what began as a comedic outlet has evolved into a robust online community and support network that conducts fundraisers for and donates to military charities, has helped veterans struggling with PTSD and other issues, and on numerous occasions, literally saved lives.
Now, Caddy shares more great DS stories-most never before seen-in this humorous collection. Often profane, sometimes profound, yet always entertaining, these rants from real life soldiers are interspersed with lively sidebars, Top 10 lists, stories from fans, one-liners, and more.
For anyone who has suffered a hard-ass manager (in uniform or not), Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said will add a much needed dose of humor to the day.
ME: MAIL CALL, DRILL SERGEANT. SDS: DID YOU GET ANY MAIL, PRIVATE? ME: NO, DRILL SERGEANT. SDS: WELL, I DID. The SDS said, “Why don’t you go ahead and read this to the troop.” He handed me the package that I had seen during mail call earlier and I reached in, and while I was pulling out the letter . . . a baby blanket, a pacifier, and a teddy bear fell out. Fuck. My. Life. Dear Mr. Drill Sergeant, Thank you so much for watching after my very special boy while he attends what he calls Day
HEAR ME WHISPERING SOMETHING. ‘WHAT IS IT, POP-POP?’ THEY’RE GONNA ASK AS THEY LEAN DOWN, AND ALL THEY’RE GONNA HEAR IS ME SAYING, ‘PRIVATE, PUT YOUR GODDAMN NOSE TO THE FUCKING CHARGING HANDLE!’” YOU SHOULD REALLY GIVE YOUR DRILL SERGEANT SOME SPACE . . . “PRIVATE, GO AWAY, YOU SMELL LIKE FAILURE AND CORN CHIPS.” PLANNING FOR THE FUTURE . . . DS: WHAT DO YOU WANT OUT OF LIFE? PRIVATE: I WOULD LOVE TO HAVE A PIECE OF PROPERTY TO CALL MY OWN ONE DAY. DS: SEE THAT PATCH OF GRASS OVER THERE?
veterans I’ve talked with over the years, you can probably also speak to the impact that a drill sergeant has on your life after Basic Training has ended. This book, and the Awesome Sh*t My Drill Sergeant Said Facebook page that spawned it, collect the very best quotes, stories, lists, words of wisdom—and maybe a few insults—from America’s finest drill sergeants. While they may not be there to uplift your spirits or compliment your wardrobe, drill sergeants have honed their ability to transform
young men and women into professional disciplined warriors—and maybe have a good laugh (at you) while they do it. THE DRILL SERGEANT CREED I am a drill sergeant I will assist each individual in their efforts to become a highly motivated, well disciplined, physically and mentally fit soldier, capable of defeating any enemy on today’s modern battlefield. I will instill pride in all I train. Pride in self, in the Army, and in country. I will insist that each soldier meets and maintains the Army