The Terrible Two
Mac Barnett, Jory John
Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub
—Jeff kinney, author of the Diary of a Wimpy Kid series
—Dav Pilkey, author of the Captain Underpants series
Miles Murphy is not happy to be moving to Yawnee Valley, a sleepy town that’s famous for one thing and one thing only: cows. In his old school, everyone knew him as the town’s best prankster, but Miles quickly discovers that Yawnee Valley already has a prankster, and a great one. If Miles is going to take the title from this mystery kid, he is going to have to raise his game.
It’s prankster against prankster in an epic war of trickery, until the two finally decide to join forces and pull off the biggest prank ever seen: a prank so huge that it would make the members of the International Order of Disorder proud.
In The Terrible Two, bestselling authors and friends Mac Barnett and Jory John have created a series that has its roots in classic middle-grade literature yet feels fresh and new at the same time.
“The pranks, the brotherhood, the art, the heart! What’s not to love about the Terrible Two?”
—Sara Pennypacker, author of the Clementine series
“You don’t have to be a cow, like cows, or even know a cow to love the Terrible Two.”
“This book is terrible! Terribly funny, terribly full of pranks, and terribly wonderful.”
—Jon Scieszka, author of The Stinky Cheese Man and the Frank Einstein series
“The Terrible Two are my kind of kids. And what’s more, they’re kids’ kind of kids.”
—Annie Barrows, author of the Ivy & Bean series
anybody look cool in a turtleneck. And Miles had never seen Niles look cool at all. But he did tonight. He looked taller. He looked . . . in control. “Why did you bring the chicken?” asked Niles. Miles looked down at the chicken, then back up at Niles. “Um . . . I thought we might need it.” “For what?” “Like, maybe this meeting had something to do with the chicken,” said Miles. “The chicken was just a way to deliver a message. A prankster often communicates with another prankster by writing
a message on a rubber chicken.” “Oh,” said Miles. “OK. So do you want the chicken back? Or should I just keep him, or drop him somewhere, or—” “Forget about the chicken!” Niles said. Somewhere in the distance, a cow mooed. This meeting was getting away from Miles. “You ruined my birthday party prank!” he shouted at Niles. “I saved your birthday party prank.” “Saved it? Saved it?” Miles tried to laugh, but his mouth was dry and he could only cough. “That’s insane. You stole all my presents.
Chapter 28 THE NEXT MORNING there was a rubber chicken in Miles’s locker. At half past three Miles rang the doorbell of the big blue house at 47 Buttercream Lane. Niles answered, sashless. “You made it.” Miles held up the chicken. “I learned the telephone cipher in kindergarten.” “You didn’t have to bring the chicken.” “Oh yeah. I forgot.” “Come in.” The Sparks residence was tidy and quiet. Niles led Miles through room after white-carpeted room. Beige sofas, big TVs, bar stools that
shuffling around the kitchen, preparing breakfast. Breakfast smelled like eggs. And cows. Although that might’ve just been the cows. Miles ate his eggs. They tasted like dread, although that might’ve just been the dread. The dread stayed with him on the car ride to Yawnee Valley Science and Letters Academy. “Mom, what if I skipped this grade?” Miles said. “Lots of kids skip a grade. Then I could just spend this year working on projects. You know I have a lot of projects. This could be my
Barkin hung up his phone. His face was a deep indigo. “I will destroy Miles Murphy,” he said. Judy Murphy put the phone next to Miles’s ear. “Hi, Miles!” said Niles. “It’s me, Niles, your school buddy. From school. The one with the sash. We sat next to each other. All day today.” “Yeah, and then you followed me home,” said Miles. “Technically I was walking you home, except you were running, and I can’t run very fast because of my allergies.” “OK,” said Miles. “Why are you calling?” “As your